The Truth In Goodbye
by Viva Vannah
Summary: When Edward said goobye, Bella fell apart. Jacob put her together. When it comes back to it, who will she chose? R&R, even if you don't like it, PLEASE! FOR THE LOVE OF CARLISLE, PLEASE! Flamers welcome.
1. The Truth In Goodbye

The Truth In Goodbye

Moderated severely. I do not own Twilight, sadly. I wish I had those skills. Set in New Moon, where "he" {Edward} leaves Bella in the woods. In this chapter, as far as you know nothing had changed  just being Bella. Very short.

The look on his face was enough to make me want to flat out cry. He didn't even care! "Edward! I love you! Please, don't go!" but the face in my vision didn't respond. It took my numbed mind a minute to realize I was seeing things.

I staggered forward, reaching for the apparition, hoping I was so gone that I could actually feel him. No luck, but my foot did touch a rock. The ground was soft, surprisingly. I didn't want to get up, but the desire to touch, to see, to hold my Edward was so strong that I pushed up and almost crawled in the direction I think he went in.

A voice, almost comical in its hoarseness, seemed to appear from nowhere. Another second to realize it was mine. His name, again and again. This was some sort of sick joke, he can't leave. He said he wouldn't hurt me.

Seconds, minutes, hours melted together. It didn't matter, I couldn't tell. The forest was always dark, so oppressive. The night things where always out, an everlasting nighttime here. The plants grow fast, maybe nobody will find my body.

I shook my head. How could I think that? But I couldn't make myself regret it. If Edward didn't want me, then life didn't matter. Nothing would, could or should matter. Charlie is fine by himself, he has been for a long time. Renee has Phil, she'll be fine. And Jacob… he'll be fine. My palms should sting, my jeans should be tearing at the knees. Nobody could find me here.

Holy crow, I must be getting tired, and the ground it cool. I collapse on my back and stare at the green canopy. Green. Edward's eyes used to be green. Gold. His eyes. Black. His eyes when he's thirsty. White. His skin. Bronze. His hair. Red. His lips. The simple, rough colors painted a picture in my mind.

I started dumbly at the canopy, painting on it like a canvass by Monee, DaVinci, Donatello. But more perfectly, every pane of his face molded, every curve of his body. An angels face, the angel I loved. Too bad things never go my way. Too bad he doesn't love me back. Not like I love him, anyway.

And that's all I remember before there where hands on me. They were too warm to be the hands I wanted, and a part of me struggled against the touch. I didn't say anything, didn't fight, but let myself fall. The face above me, creased with worry, was familiar in a dreamlike way. I guess I stared, because the face looked away.

The air was silent except for the crushingly slow progression of human footsteps. I swallowed dryly, my throat making a clicking sound. Then voices. Low voices, all male. I suppose if I was sane I would recognize them, but I couldn't discern anything in the jumble. I did know that I was laying on something soft, and the muted blue light above was putting me out. And so I slept.


	2. Angels, Heaven, Morphine

Chapter 2: Heaven, Angels, Morphine

Lucky Mrs. Meyer owns twilight. That's what people with skittles can do. Also, bear with me. The s on my keyboard is hardly working and I practically have to hit it with a hammer to make it work. So yeah.

I slowly came to, waking up in an all-too-familiar scene. Those long, narrow lights and the white tiled floor. Crinkly hospital gown. Hard plastic chairs, parked by my bed. A circular wood table meant for things of comfort, gifts and get-well cards. As usual, nothing there. Despair racked me, and I shook like I do when I wake up from a nightmare.

What happened? Why was I here? "Where Is Edward?" I said, confused. Hospital scenes like this usually mean Edward sitting there blaming himself. The dark corner of the room seemed to move, and the russet skin, black hair kicked me in the gut.

I remembered. It all came back in a wave that would crush NYC. My mouth dried out and my head hit the pillow. The Quileute boy jumped forward, dropping to his knees beside my bed. I only know it because his face was inches from mine. I stared blankly, not absorbing anything.

"Bella? Bella?" I'd heard that so many times. The sound of my name that way was enough to make my throat tighten and my eyes pinch closed. I started shaking, quivering really, and some beeping I hadn't noticed before started to speed up until it sounded like one long beeeeeep.

As if on cue, two or three nurses scampered in. "Sorry, sorry! I'll go! I didn't mean to…" the rough voice started going again. My hand struck something blunt and there was a high sound, then a keening that hurt my head. A pinprick poked my arm, and the blackness enveloped me.

When I woke up again, my throat felt raw and sore. I pried my eyes open and glanced around, trying to be startled. My room had changed to dollar store. Balloons and little stuffed teddy bears holding bright red hearts stared at me. Three people hung around the corner of the room, all the same with long hair.

"Jacob?" Was that my voice? God, I sounded awful. The trio turned to stare at me with gaping mouths. I didn't recognize any of them. One turned and leaned out the door into the hallway. "Dr. Gerandy?" he said, an unfamiliar tone in his voice. "She's awake." In less than a millisecond a gray haired elderly man was at the door.

"Are you sure? You know how she's been talking in her sleep." I winced slightly, worried. What had I said?

"Yeah, pretty sure. She didn't say Edward, she said Jacob." My body was late in reacting to the pain. My hands snapped up, clasped over my ears. The world was shaking and turning red. "Don't say it!" I screamed. "Don't say it!" Dr. Gerandy leaned towards me, peeking through his spectacles. "Don't say what, dear?"

Anger and pain washed over me. "Don't say his name! Don't say it!" The boy at the door turned slightly. "Embry, go get Jake." The name acted like a salve. My screaming eased down, I lay still. Forever passed before Jake got there.

"Bella," he sighed, kneeling by me again. I stared up, facing the others. I just stared, until Jacob noticed. "Erm…maybe you guys should go for a bit. Bella?" I faced him slowly. "Jake." I stated, more like a question. "What happened, Jake?"

His face twisted in pain, for what, I didn't know. "The, uh, C- they left. He left you in the woods, I guess you got lost. I found you out there…dear God…" It looked like he was seeing the devil in action. "He's gone." I whispered. I didn't believe it, couldn't convince myself to believe it.

"Yes." Was all I got. Gone. Gone. Gone. Didn't love me.

_He looked away into the trees as he spoke again. "Of course, I'll always love you…in a way. But what happened the other night made me realize that it's time for a change. Because I'm…tired of pretending to be something I'm not, Bella. I am not human." He looked back, and the icy planes of his perfect face were not human. "I've let this go on much too long, and I'm sorry for that."_

"_Don't." My voice was just a whisper now; awareness was beginning to seep through me, trickling like acid through my veins. "Don't do this."_

Jacob reached out hesitantly, attempting to wake me from my silent reverie. I didn't move an inch, but my eyes traveled to his face. "He doesn't want me. He never did." I said, sounding so sure.

The Quileute was still, except his eyes which turned to fire. He didn't say anything, but slowly got up. He was soundless as he left the room, while I continued to stare at the place where he had been. I sighed softly. He was too good to be part of this, so, so kind. I pitied him deep down, in the part of me that wasn't already throwing a pity party for myself.


End file.
